...and my response: thanks so much for this feedback, I am so glad it was helpful, and I hope you continue to unearth those hidden pressures.
A story from the other day: I wanted to see the decorations in a nearby neighborhood, and we happened to be driving past on the way home from grandpa’s. I made a spontaneous decision to just go for it. My husband and I got to ooh and ah over the decorations. My son didn’t care about any of it but he tolerated the detour as long as he had screen time.
Just got this great feedback from another group: sharing anonymously!
“I’ve been meaning to comment on this for a few days- reading it helped me pinpoint some hidden holiday pressure within myself. The need to see the big light displays, go to holiday concerts and choirs, attend crowded holiday parties.. Exactly none of those things are necessary AND they are actually ‘too much’ for my kids. I want to give them the best holiday season, which paradoxically means opting out when I know it’s not a good fit. Thanks for this beautiful and much needed reminder 💛”
Thanks so much for this Kate! It was uber-validating. It’s so helpful to just drop all the ‘typical’ (they really ARE neurotypical expectations) expectations of kids and self for the holidays. Every year we get lower and lower demand. This year, we’re calling it a “no surprise Christmas” since the ‘holding it in’ feeling for our kids (one with sensory processing and the other intense) just creates stress for them. It’s liberating! They don’t have to hold in the surprise and can just blurt it out. And then we’re going to open presents when it makes sense….rather than saving it all up for this giant crescendo. And funny enough….it’s feeling liberating for us too. :)
...and my response: thanks so much for this feedback, I am so glad it was helpful, and I hope you continue to unearth those hidden pressures.
A story from the other day: I wanted to see the decorations in a nearby neighborhood, and we happened to be driving past on the way home from grandpa’s. I made a spontaneous decision to just go for it. My husband and I got to ooh and ah over the decorations. My son didn’t care about any of it but he tolerated the detour as long as he had screen time.
Just got this great feedback from another group: sharing anonymously!
“I’ve been meaning to comment on this for a few days- reading it helped me pinpoint some hidden holiday pressure within myself. The need to see the big light displays, go to holiday concerts and choirs, attend crowded holiday parties.. Exactly none of those things are necessary AND they are actually ‘too much’ for my kids. I want to give them the best holiday season, which paradoxically means opting out when I know it’s not a good fit. Thanks for this beautiful and much needed reminder 💛”
Thanks so much for this Kate! It was uber-validating. It’s so helpful to just drop all the ‘typical’ (they really ARE neurotypical expectations) expectations of kids and self for the holidays. Every year we get lower and lower demand. This year, we’re calling it a “no surprise Christmas” since the ‘holding it in’ feeling for our kids (one with sensory processing and the other intense) just creates stress for them. It’s liberating! They don’t have to hold in the surprise and can just blurt it out. And then we’re going to open presents when it makes sense….rather than saving it all up for this giant crescendo. And funny enough….it’s feeling liberating for us too. :)
I feel so much of this Kate!