Parenting Isn't Easy, and That Belief Sets Us Up for Resentment

I lost my temper a little bit, and then I gave myself grace and enjoyed the noodles.

The belief that parenting our neurodivergent kids should be easy is setting us up for disappointment, resentment, and guilt.

What if it isn't supposed to be easy?

What if it is supposed to be hard, and by learning the skills we need to parent our kids, we grow more than we could have grown otherwise? Every time my son has a meltdown, it challenges me.

Challenge is how we evolve.

It's how we become more loving, more accepting, and stronger. Every time my kid has a meltdown, I go through the whole gauntlet of emotion, disappointment, resentment, and guilt. That doesn't change, but what I do with those feelings, and my resistance, has changed. I am more present and available to him because my nervous system is not flooded. I bounce back more easily. I understand that it's supposed to be hard.

We live in NYC, but that fact barely registers as we pass days and weeks rarely leaving our leafy corner of South Brooklyn. I’m grateful for friends who draw us out of our comfort zone. They remind us…