This morning I posted a Note about last week’s National School Counseling Week. School counselors played a big role in helping our teens navigate new diagnoses of ADHD and anxiety. They were the conduit between me, the teachers and my kids at school as we implemented strategies, evaluated them, and readjusted approaches.
That’s fantastic. They say it only takes one trusted adult in the school to make a massive difference in a kid’s life (not just the time at that school).
Yes, I am definitely seeing my 6yo ADHDer, who also has high anxiety, behave in a much more aggressive and anxious way at school these past couple of weeks. Though we at home are trying to keep everything stable, we live in south Minneapolis and the tension remains very high in and around the school. He is highly sensitive and communicates with his body before his words. It is a lot for all of us to hold here.
That level of cognitive dissonance would be so hard for me. While routine can be reassuring, pressure to pretend all is normal is not.
If you were in a war zone, would you be required to arrive at school on time and prepared?
Ideally school would change temporarily to become a place for trauma triage, mutual aid, and food distribution. The question “How are you really feeling?” Would replace “Did you do your homework?” Going to school in your community right now should be a solace. A place to gather in solidarity.
Safety would be the priority. Demands would be relaxed. Just showing up would be celebrated. How would your nervous system respond if your community truly acknowledged the load on everyone right now, especially the kids? If you don’t have that, there’s a disconnect. A lost opportunity. At least in your home you can create those conditions.
Don’t be afraid to do things a different way. The way of continuing as if all is normal isn’t working, so you might as well.
Yes, thank you. What I am struggling with — one of the things — is that we will and must continue on in our day-to-day routines while acknowledging that everyone’s nervous systems are highly activated because we all feel threatened to some degree — trying to push the abnormal into a normal is not feeling great.
Hi Erin. I’d like to introduce myself. I live near White Bear Lake, so our worlds are not far apart. My kids are 20 years older than yours. You are wise to seek healthy communication for relationship building.
I love this sentence. You are not the discipline arm of the school. I am a part-time EL teacher in a school that tries to use parents in this way. And I feel like it's so harmful to kids' relationships with their parents, in addition to being counterproductive for relationship building between teacher and student.
This morning I posted a Note about last week’s National School Counseling Week. School counselors played a big role in helping our teens navigate new diagnoses of ADHD and anxiety. They were the conduit between me, the teachers and my kids at school as we implemented strategies, evaluated them, and readjusted approaches.
That’s fantastic. They say it only takes one trusted adult in the school to make a massive difference in a kid’s life (not just the time at that school).
Yes, I am definitely seeing my 6yo ADHDer, who also has high anxiety, behave in a much more aggressive and anxious way at school these past couple of weeks. Though we at home are trying to keep everything stable, we live in south Minneapolis and the tension remains very high in and around the school. He is highly sensitive and communicates with his body before his words. It is a lot for all of us to hold here.
That level of cognitive dissonance would be so hard for me. While routine can be reassuring, pressure to pretend all is normal is not.
If you were in a war zone, would you be required to arrive at school on time and prepared?
Ideally school would change temporarily to become a place for trauma triage, mutual aid, and food distribution. The question “How are you really feeling?” Would replace “Did you do your homework?” Going to school in your community right now should be a solace. A place to gather in solidarity.
Safety would be the priority. Demands would be relaxed. Just showing up would be celebrated. How would your nervous system respond if your community truly acknowledged the load on everyone right now, especially the kids? If you don’t have that, there’s a disconnect. A lost opportunity. At least in your home you can create those conditions.
Don’t be afraid to do things a different way. The way of continuing as if all is normal isn’t working, so you might as well.
I know you’re doing your best. I’ll share what I return to when times are toughest:
- Mindfulness: this is a moment of suffering. It’s not forever.
- Others also feel this way. I’m not alone.
-I can be as kind to myself as I would be to my best friend.
it’s self-compassion and it really helps me.
Yes, thank you. What I am struggling with — one of the things — is that we will and must continue on in our day-to-day routines while acknowledging that everyone’s nervous systems are highly activated because we all feel threatened to some degree — trying to push the abnormal into a normal is not feeling great.
Hi Erin. I’d like to introduce myself. I live near White Bear Lake, so our worlds are not far apart. My kids are 20 years older than yours. You are wise to seek healthy communication for relationship building.
Thank you, Cindy. I am always listening to all my kids with all of the senses I’ve got. And I will just keep trying.
Love seeing the community building here 🤗
I love this sentence. You are not the discipline arm of the school. I am a part-time EL teacher in a school that tries to use parents in this way. And I feel like it's so harmful to kids' relationships with their parents, in addition to being counterproductive for relationship building between teacher and student.