Why I’m Not Punishing My Tween: Mindful Parenting in Middle School

Our kids start growing bigger and the world expects more of them. They feel that pressure and may need us more than ever.

Photo by Nathaniel Chang on Unsplash

Hi Parents,

Here’s a post I wrote for Mutha Magazine 3 years ago. Ocean'’s starting High School in September, so I’ll share my follow-up with you some time this summer…

My Tween Is Struggling and I’m Worried 

My son is 10 and entering middle school. I see him struggling with himself. I see him having a harder time accepting feedback than he has since he was a toddler. I see him behaving in ways that make me uncomfortable.  

I know he needs more autonomy, but that need is coinciding with really bad choices. I worry, what will become of him if he continues fighting with friends, talking back to adults, and either ignoring or raging at his parents?  

He has had a few meltdowns that rival those of the toddler years, except that now he is bigger, louder, and throws things at my head. He has also punched his best friend a few times, who he has always been so patient with in the past. I wonder, are his hormones raging before any physical signs?  

I try to micro…